Harrietts Tomato

Pastafarianism

For those who don't get the New York Times...Ms. Tomato would like to direct her more subversive readers to a website referred to in a 9/29/05 Arts section article, venganza.org.   

The ingenious author, Bobby Henderson, assigns a muddle of spaghetti with meatballs some divine qualities, and suggests in an open letter to the Kansas State Board of Education that they give equal time in their classrooms to his own theory of Intelligent Design.  The said Board, with warm approval from President Bush, has moved toward  allowing the teaching of Intelligent Design as an alternative to  evolution in their schools. 

Mr. Henderson claims he had a divine vision of an intelligent god called the Flying Spaghetti Monster, or FSM, and threatened a lawsuit if Kansas Educational Authorities do not consider his curriculum. In Mr. Henderson's spiritual universe, one says "ramen" at the end of a prayer, instead of "amen".  Several readers of his website have posted sightings of the deity and testify to having been touched by "his noodly appendage." 

In our opinion, a decent spaghetti and meatballs is most certainly divine, and should not be withheld from future generations.  T-Shirts and mugs are available.

The Omega Institute

As the sun rises over the placid lake at The Omega Institute in upstate New York, Tim the Baker has already put in several hours laboring over the dough.  By the time the conch-shell horns sound for 7am breakfast, he’s turned out a couple thousand raspberry muffins, prepped dozens of dill and garlic foccaccias for lunch, and kneaded and formed some of the 275 loaves of bread he bakes each week.

Like Diddy, Tim and several of his co-workers are known by only one name. You won’t see Tim’s picture here, I’m afraid.  Though I spent two weeks as his immediate neighbor, my tent pitched in front of the swanky new van he calls home, his vampiric work hours provided few opportunities for an encounter, and when I did spot him he was usually snoozing in his hammock.

He and several other hardworking souls are spending the summer season at The Omega Institute for Holistic Studies, a campus spread across 195 acres of beautiful hilly green land and lake in the Hudson River Valley.  Founded in the late 70's, over 12,000 participants a year come here to attend classes on art, yoga, nutrition, tantric sexuality, philosophy, spirituality, building rustic furniture, tennis, dance, and a myriad of other subjects.

John, with the help of an energetic young guy named "L", manages the food operation.  They are also both cracker kundalini yoga instructors.  John joined the permanent staff a few years ago, bringing an extensive background in the culinary business, at one point overseeing the kitchens for the Archdioses in Florida.  Gliding through the dining hall like a monarch perusing his estate, he keeps everything flowing, clean and food-friendly…not easy when a large percentage of the staff are seasonal volunteers, some of them untrained and only there for 2 weeks at a time.

An organic garden in the center of the campus provides greens and herbs, but John also deals with local farmers and growers to find the considerable amount of fresh produce needed to supply the dining hall as well as the café.   He keeps everything as organic and sustainable as possible, using Dean’s Beans coffee, unbleached flours, whole grains such as quinoa, and non-hormone milk from a local dairy.

There is always an impressive display of fresh fruit in the dining hall, and at meals the vegetables have a taste I can best describe as alive.  Dining hall food is included in the price of a stay on campus, but the café is optional and cash is exchanged.  It’s an airy bohemian-tech space with cool music punctuated by the sound of milk steaming, the perfume of quesadillas wafting by, old comfy couches to lounge in, and wireless internet service throughout. 

The dining hall offers a hot and cold buffet l with the freshest, crunchiest salad bar, divine homemade dressings, a soup at each meal including breakfast, and mostly vegetarian food throughout with the exception of fish once a week. Every second night there is a gooey desert such as banana cake with cream cheese frosting or fruit, cake and cream trifle.

Here’s a list of some of the hot food I had at Omega during my two weeks:

Salad salad salad
Falafel and pita bread
Vegetable tagine with raita
Grilled Asian sesame tofu
Baked Tilapia with aioli
Pizza
Lasagna
Chilaquiles
Beet burgers
Tempeh vegetable stirfry
Macaroni and cheese
Cheese and broccoli frittata.

As a volunteer, I worked as a camp counselor for 8 and 9 year old kids for a week, then “floated” the second, running hot food out to the dining room, handling the Hobart dishwashing machine, stripping and making beds, and hoisting suitcases onto a van, for a total of 30 hours per week. 

It's not for nothing they call this "work", so after a day of this, a girl's gotta take advantage of the short trek uphill to the Wellness Center for a sauna and a massage.  Also available are reflexology appointments, facials, shamanic work, psychic readings or whatever caretaking your body and soul need.

The perks of volunteering at Omega are pretty amazing.  There is a choice of two to three yoga classes a day, a dance class at noon, lakefront Tai Chi in the morning, meditation, shamanic journeys, movie screenings, concerts, kayaking in the lake, art classes, and a neverending supply of good food.  And there is that sense of oasis and community with lovely people who really want the world to be a great, thriving place and to have a part in making it so. 

Plus you don’t have to wash your own salad greens.

Omega accepts applications for seasonal staff volunteers starting
sometime around December.  They generally contact potential staffmembers in February for a phone interview.  Applicants must be at least 18 years old and view their time as a real commitment.  For me it was an absolutely worthwhile one.  www.eomega.org/omega/job/seasonal/

Thirsty Virgin

The Thirsty Virgin, by Christopher Collard.

Warm Artichoke Gratin

WARM ARTICHOKE GRATIN
Serves 4-6       

1 can artichoke bottoms or quarters       
1/2 stick (4 Tbsp) unsalted butter            
3 cloves fresh garlic, coarse chop            
1/2 to 3/4 cup dry white wine       
salt & ground pepper to taste

Drain the artichokes completely, squeezing out excess water.  Chop them coarsely.

Heat a skillet, add all the butter minus 1 tablespoon.  You will put this on top of the gratin later.  Add garlic and cook gently until soft, about 5 minutes, stirring.  Don’t let it brown.  Add artichokes, cook gently another 5 minutes, until heated through and soft.  Turn up heat, add 1/2 cup white wine and cook, stirring, until the liquid reduces but mixture is still very moist.

Put in food processor or blender and puree.  If it is too thick, splash in more white wine.  Season with salt and pepper to taste.

Put in an individual sized gratin dish and even out top.  It will be about one inch thick.  Dot with bits of remaining butter, grind fresh pepper on top.  Place under the broiler until the top bubbles and browns, about 5 minutes.

Serve right away with fresh baguette or rustic country bread.  Nice with dry Cava,  Proseco, or Champagne.

Steamed Artichokes

STEAMED ARTICHOKES

With a very sharp knife, remove the stem very close to the body of the artichoke and pull off a few of the thicker leaves from the bottom exterior.

Cut off about an inch from the tip of the choke.

With a pair of kitchen scissors, snip the prickly top off all the remaining leaves.

If you want to be fussy and French about it, you can tie a cut round of lemon on the top and the bottom of the choke, and tie it with kitchen twine. It will still cook without this if you don’t have the time, but the lemon keeps the choke from discoloring, the string will prevent the outer leaves from falling off, and it will be nicer.

Put the chokes in one layer in a pot that just holds them, standing up, in boiling, salted water that reaches about 2 inches up their sides.  Cover and simmer for 20-40 minutes, depending on their size. They are cooked when a thin knife inserted in the center goes in easily.

They can be served warm, but are easier to deal with if you allow them to cool completely in the fridge,  Either way, spread the leaves gently open and locate the purplish inner leaves in the center. Pull them out firmly.  Underneath, there should be furry bits that would one day become very beautiful, fragrant blue flower petals.  With a small spoon, scrape these out gently without damaging the heart underneath.

Now you have created a little bowl that will hold some kind of delicious dip or dressing.  Once the leaves have been eaten – only the little sweet ends, of course -- the heart will be revealed which is, or course, the tastiest prize of all.

Globe Cuisine

Ms. Tomato remembers a time before exotics the likes of cilantro, balsamic vinegar and globe artichokes were commonplace on grocery shelves.  Yes, she is that grown-up.  Indeed, it was once all about curly, rust-tinged parsley, white or red vinegar, and canned artichoke hearts, IF you could locate them in the miniscule imported section.

During childhood days of yore, mothers, for that is who did the shopping and cooking in most households, looked at strange objects appearing in the market with all the awe and trepidation of a Pygmy in the bush happening upon a tall Swedish tourist with a camera.

“What is that?” asked Ms. Tomato’s mother one fine day, as her small daughter begged to take an artichoke home.  “What would you DO with it?”  Granted, the artichoke is a cactus-like thistley creature, but that doesn’t mean it wants to hurt you or that it doesn’t need love and understanding, as do all living things.

Even now, there may be an intimidation factor hovering around the artichoke.  Like a Victorian Lady, it wears a lot of stuff as protection, all intended to keep away those with questionable intentions and lack of appreciation for the value of the inner jewel, also known as “the heart”. 

But there is always a way into the heart, as long as one is conscious of what one is doing, and it’s not as difficult as it seems, provided one has a heart oneself.  And, in that spirit, what follows are a few instructions to help us along. 

With a very sharp knife, remove the stem very close to the body of the artichoke and pull off a few of the thicker leaves from the bottom exterior.

Cut off about an inch from the tip of the choke.

With a pair of kitchen scissors, snip the prickly top off all the remaining leaves.

If you want to be fussy and French about it, you can tie a cut round of lemon on the top and the bottom of the choke, and tie it with kitchen twine. It will still cook without this if you don’t have the time, but the lemon keeps the choke from discoloring, the string will prevent the outer leaves from falling off, and it will be nicer.

Put the chokes in one layer in a pot that just holds them, standing up, in boiling, salted water that reaches about 2 inches up their sides.  Cover and simmer for 20-40 minutes, depending on their size.  They are cooked when a thin knife inserted in the center goes in easily.

They can be served warm, but are easier to deal with if you allow them to cool completely in the fridge,  Either way, spread the leaves gently open and locate the purplish inner leaves in the center. Pull them out firmly.  Underneath, there should be furry bits that would one day become very beautiful, fragrant blue flower petals.  With a small spoon, scrape these out gently without damaging the heart underneath.

Now you have created a little bowl that will hold some kind of delicious dip or dressing.  Once the leaves have been eaten – only the little sweet ends, of course -- the heart will be revealed which is, or course, the tastiest prize of all.

A little footnote on the globe artichoke.  Henry VIII, famous King of England best known for his large appetite, extraordinary girth, serial wife executions, and the outlawing of “buggery” as well as the “invoking of evil spirits,” was apparently a fan of this vegetable.  He grew them in his garden at Newhall in the 1530’s, after Dutch merchants introduced them at court.  During his day it was used in sweet preserves as well as savory dishes. 

It was cultivated in the eastern Mediterannean before the 12th century and introduced to the rest of Europe around the 15th and 16th centuries.  Still very popular in Western Europe, the Italians use it to manufacture an aperitif called “Cynar”.  The globe artichoke is related to the cardoon, and both belong to the genus called “cynara”, thus the liquor’s name.  Cynar is quite sweet, as are most aperitifs, and is a nice mixer with tonic and lime, or on its own in small sipping quanities.